How not to get a job.

Because of my work with a network of churches, I often get requests from people looking for church work. I am often amazed at the poor grammar in many of these requests, and in resumes that I receive. I got this one today. I have removed the person’s name, the name of the church, and the name of the town. It is not my desire to embarrass this young man; but rather to make a point. If you are trying to impress someone to help you look for a job where communication is one of the most important skills, you may want to have someone look over your request before sending it.

ACTUAL EMAIL:

Hey my name is _________ and I am the pastor son at ________ baptist church in ____________ NC and I am licence in the ministry and I am also have my associate degree in bibical studies and bachelor degree in Bible studies and I have been preaching at different churches for almost 3 years and I was was wondering are there any churches in this assocation looking for a supply pastor or intermin or full time pastor.

I have a few suggested improvements. Some of these  are grammatical, other are stylistic:

  1. Don’t start a correspondence with someone you don’t know with “Hey”.
  2. Pastor’s son (possessive).
  3. Baptist (capitalized).
  4. __________, NC. (add comma after city name and period after “NC“).
  5. I am licensed (drop “and”, begin new sentence, spell “license” correctly and put it in the past tense).
  6. to the Ministry (replace “in” with “to”).
  7. I also have (drop “and”, begin new sentence, drop “am”).
  8. Associate’s Degree (capitalize and add possessive).
  9. Biblical Studies (capitalize and correct spelling).
  10. Bachelor’s Degree (capitalize and add possessive).
  11. Bible Studies (capitalize “studies” for consistency’s sake; was this the actual degree program?).
  12. I have been (drop “and”, start a new sentence).
  13. and I was (drop extra “was”).
  14. wondering if there are any church (reword).
  15. association (spell correctly).
  16. supply pastor, interim pastor, or full-time pastor. (reword, add comma, spell interim correctly, hyphenate full-time).

This may sound harsh, but I wouldn’t recommend him to a church based on this email. It also makes me wonder where he got his two degrees!